You rushed to the theater to see Iron Man 3 during opening weekend. Thank you for checking-in and enjoy! Share this one proudly. It’s from our friends at Disney.
This soul, whom we of a certain disposition shall call Luke, began his life in a very cramped box.
He was a snub-nosed, flat-browed, common-faced boy; he liked fruit and bread. He lived most of his life in danger of fainting from exhaustion; none the less he dwelled until he was fifteen inside this box. But one day he fell out of the box.
When he violently plunged outwards, he fell into a cube. The cube was exactly as he thought it would be, exactly how the poets of his time described cubes.
A face here, a face there, some corners, a canvas of endurance, some width, some height, some volume, some length, and oh, what’s this?
It was a very special indeed, as it occurred to him that a cube was in fact very similar to a box, just a bit more of a shade of lavender.
When he instantaneously turned sixteen he had his very first kiss, a stupid and ultimately worthless kiss that he still remembers with great fondness.
The next day he discovered the truth about heartbreak, which was that it’s not nearly as full of pompous purpose as some had led him to believe.
It was very quiet, as it was in fact not too dissimilar from a severe case of generalized muscle pain.
By the next diurnal course, he was eighteen and thus capable of every rational adult decision. And so, he never made a right perfection wrongly disgraced.
That is, until he coincidentally met a particularly noble creature whose name we shall avoid to protect her anonymity.
It was at this time that our hero, whose name we shall avoid on the basis that we have forgotten it and it was invented and thus never important to begin with, turned well and truly irrational.
That was the end of all that
The very next winter he split into two perfectly symmetrical halves, both in competitive collaboration against each other.
The inaugural half insisted on returning to the box, as it was perhaps never a good idea to have left it.
The latter half disagreed, and assuredly declared that it was a much better idea to continue moving on the downward slope.
Eventually both halves divided themselves into four, then eight, then sixteen, then for one strange week they were 127, only to be 256 the very next day.
This kept inevitably happening until our main character, whose name you now looked up the page to remember and thus eliminate the need for me to help you recall, was so small he could not be seen with the human eye.
By nightfall, he was a fine powdery mist. In the morning he adventurously jaunted northward and was breathed by a young boy, who we shall call Luke.
It was at this stage that Luke realized that he distinctly had never left the box.
Poor fella, he just wants to be loved!
Take my knife, take my spork
Take me where I use no fork
I don’t care, my hands are free
You can’t take this cake from me.
Take me out I want a snack
Tell’em that cake ain’t comin’ back
Burn the toast and boil the tea
You can’t take this cake from me.
Leave the crumbs where they lay
They’ll never see another day
Lost my soul, this fillings cream
You can’t take this cake from me.
I feel the cake reaching out
I hear it’s song without a doubt
I still hear and I still see
That you can’t take this cake from me.
Lost my knife, lost my spork
Lost the last place I’ll use my fork
There’s no place I can be
Since I’ve found Serenity
And you can’t take this cake from me.
OH MY GOD
OH MY FREAKING GOD
The fact that someone was actually paid to put a little hat on EACH AND EVERY ONE of those ducks is beyond me.
LOOK AT THIS KID.
His name is Red, not Ash.
Yes, he does come from Pallet Town.
And he also eventually becomes the trainer of a Pikachu.
But this kid is very different from the well-known Ash Ketchum.
He nicknames his Pokemon. He has red eyes. He travels by himself. He, with the help of other Dex Holders, helps to not only put Team Rocket’s evil deeds to an end once, but twice.
ALSO, he helped fight against the Elite Four when they were trying to KILL PEOPLE.
Then he joined together with 9 other Dex Holders to fight a gigantic monster that would’ve drowned the whole world.
He set the standards for having a PokeDex- for it isn’t a tool that is just given out to EVERYONE.
When he was turned to stone, tears couldn’t bring him back. Only a wish from Jirachi could.
He started his epic journey at the age of 11.
This is also when he became Champion of the Indigo Plateau.
At 12, he faced the Elite Four.
At 13, he helped deal with the Mask of Ice.
At 16, he fought Team Rocket and Deoxys, ending with being turned to stone.
Again at 16, he faced Guile Hideout.
That’s right, he actually grows older.
Red, the Fighter, Champion, and the first Dex Holder we were introduced to, still manages to be the humble, simple, and kind-hearted rash protagonist that kicked off the whole manga.
This kid is not Ash Ketchum.
This kid is Red.
And he is one badass, fighter-man that still has his clueless moments- but that’s why we love him.
I like them both!
Ayanbadejo, who says his ultimate goal is to bring his message to Ellen DeGeneres’ show with a Super Bowl ring and “bust a move”,is currently figuring out the best way to make that message resonate in the biggest arena in pro football.
I don’t like the new Tumblr post page. I suffer from severe sight loss, and contrast is important when looking at things, such as reading letters, looking at labels or reading things on the web. I use a magnifier often, so I can quickly enlarge and read a bit of text without screwing with the page layout (Increasing text size works sometimes, but usually it just breaks everything)
With these new icons, I’m finding it too difficult to use. I cannot see the link/unlink buttons at all, and everything else is very faint. I cannot read tags once they’ve been typed in, and above this post now is a box which upon zooming in rather large says ‘upload another photo’, which I cannot read, and it’s difficult to figure out where the edge of this box is. Furthermore, the Close button at the bottom right, I can’t see the edge clearly, and often mis-click just to the side. I can press Escape now though.
I doubt the moderators or staff of Tumblr will see this, so I won’t expect them to fix anything, but if you’re part of the Tumblr modding community, please consider making something to replace these buttons and boxes to make them easier to see for those of us with a visual impairment.
Tumblr is becoming harder to use, and is ruining my enjoyment of it, and if things keep going this way of making things look trendy rather than them being functional, communicating with my friends will eventually become more of a chore than a passtime.
This is the type of complaint that is /actually real/ and worthwhile to maybe fix for those who need it…
A big thanks to everyone who’s reblogged this, I’m happy the response was positive, and that y’all understood my difficulties. <3
Signal boost for the visually impaired community.